What can I say, I have always been morbidly curious. However, it also represents pretty much the worst way for me to possibly meet someone and I am going to go out on a predictive limb and say there is NO WAY I will meet anyone I am remotely attracted to on EHarmony. It's virtually impossible. Even if there are remotely attractive people on EHarmony (uh, not so far), the sheer scenario of pressure-y first dates will drive me away from anyone. I will squint my critical eyes and reject anyone I feel forced to evaluate romantically.

I like organic. I surmise it's why I do so well with married guys. I can get to know them without thinking of them as potential partners and OH MY GOD I COULD NOT LIVE MY LIFE WITH THE WAY THAT GUY CHEWS HIS FOOD.

Because at a certain point, when you can get to know someone in a non-pressurized context, we all know the chewing doesn't matter. But I will never get there with EHarmony Joe. Pressure of any kind makes me flee. Stop telling me who to like, website!!!

Still, it is a distraction I need right now. Something to focus my online energies on that isn't waiting for emails from Him.

Just to up the ante, I am christening this my Diary of E-Harmony disasters. I will record my cumulative despair for the male race and my uterus, one sad "match" at a time. I've made a 3-month commitment. How about it, internet?